On Being "THAT" Family

Alright. Since the birth of Baby Bosco we seem to attract more attention when we go out. Not sure why - after all 5 is only 1 more than 4. Maybe people see a baby and pay more attention. Who knows. However, I am having a difficult time adjusting to being a spectacle and it is only magnified when we become one of THOSE families - you know the ones... everyone is aware of their presence and are relieved when the family has left the premises.

My older boys attend a science class on Fridays mornings. It was a beautiful morning this past Friday so instead of running errands I stayed and let the younger 2 play on the little playground. All was well for the first few minutes. Then Sweet MO and TAZ started fighting over this plastic sword (mental note #1: do not bring only one plastic sword to the playground) TAZ being much smaller but much tougher yanks the sword out of Sweet Mo's hand, consequently spinning him around causing him to lose him balance and fall to the ground slamming his eye on the end of the sliding board on the way down. Poor guy - I know it hurt. It was a major wallop too! Bless his heart. So we go to the car and get him settled. Figuring going back on the playground would distract him from the injury we head back over. (Mental note #2: Recognize when you are off to a bad start and stay in the car - that's why you paid extra for the DVD player)

The boys play for a few minutes and then we get company. One of the teachers of the class comes outside with her precious daughter of almost 2 years old. TAZ decides he does not want sweet little girl to join him in the playhouse. So he slams the door shut in her face. I call his name and tell him to let her in and apologize. He stuck his tongue out at me!!! So I have to get up and go over and actually handle it with discipline. (which honestly when you are in public like that you kind of feel very limited in what you can do discipline wise) I am meanwhile carrying a 20 pound 4 month old in a sling. TAZ starts pitching a royal fit. I try to get him calmed down and he breaks away from me and turns around to say "HAHAHA I won". So then it gets really fun!

I hand the baby to the injured 5 year old, chase down the 3 year old, carry him kicking and screaming to the car, reach in to unlock the doors and somehow set off the car alarm (as if we were not enough of a spectacle already - we needed an alarm to broadcast it), carry said kicking and screaming child back to the playground to get the keys, have the inured 5 year old carrying the 4 month old baby back to the car, I get the alarm off, the 3 year old maniac strapped down in his car seat, take the baby, close the doors and hang my head in shame. TAZ is in the backseat just furious! He is banging his head in his car seat and screaming like a lunatic. He takes off his shoe and starts hitting the window. At this point it begins to be funny - seriously how can a 3 year old be that mad??? Finally I see the teacher waving at me (or so I thought) I wave back and smile. She waves again, I wave again, she waves again and I just look away. Turns out somewhere in the chaos I dropped my cell phone. She was trying to give it back to me. Thank Heavens there is only one class left. (Mental note #3: don't dress up and try to look cute in a skirt when going to science class - wear jeans that have back pockets for your cell phone)

So while I hate being THAT family - the one where you can hear people singing Hallelujah as they leave a place - it happens to the best of us. And if you ever see a mom out there who is just fit to be tied say a little prayer for her - chances are she REALLY needs one!!!

Road Trip!!!!!!

You simply have not lived until you have taken a 2 day whirlwind road trip with 5 boys in a van that only seats 7 people. Let's start at the beginning... my brother attends a small Catholic College in Northern VA called Christendom College. The senior class put on a production called "Murder at the UN - A Murder Mystery Dinner Theater." My brother wrote the play and directed it and his fiancee had a starring role. We decided to drive the 5 1/2 hours up to the college to see the production. It was fabulous! And as an added bonus the students provided FREE babysitting during the performance! Hey... I'm all about free babysitting. So we drove up on Saturday and returned home on Sunday.

During the dinner theater the boys played in the gymnasium of the school. The play started at 6:30 and lasted until 10:30. So the boys were awake until 11:00 PM!! We wanted to get on the road at descent time (my husband wanted to watch the end of the Masters) so we intended to go to 7:00 am Mass and then hit the road. Well... we didn't wake up until 7:15 so we ended up at 8:30 Mass. After Mass we were off. All is well until we stop for lunch. TAZ was so exhausted from the night before that he literally laid his head on the table and cried this pitiful little whimper mumbling something about a milkshake. After lunch we offer Ruby Tuesdays a heartfelt apology for the crumbs that surround the floor of our table, we load back up in the van and TAZ fell asleep for a grand total of 30 minutes. Thankfully Baby Bosco slept most of the way home.

Things got really interesting about an hour from home. At this point Flipper starts coughing (he has terrible spring allergies!) and coughing and coughing. Then Sweet MO starts crying because evidently he was annoyed that Hubblekid was reading a book. (he wasn't reading MO's book so it's anyone's guess why he cared what Hubblekid read - my vote goes to that 11:00 bedtime the night before) Then Hubblekid gets frustrated with Sweet MO and starts sighing like a 14 year old valley girl and rolling his eyes. Meanwhile my husband starts making fun of Flipper's coughing, which causes Flipper to laugh. This cough laugh combo somehow resulted in him vomiting AND getting a nosebleed. Don't ask me how. But the kid is laughing, coughing, vomiting and dabbing a nosebleed all at the same time. How is that even possible??? To top it all off TAZ is sitting there singing about a penguin. So we have Sweet Mo crying, Hubblekid sighing, Flipper vomiting and bleeding, TAZ singing about a penguin and Baby Bosco sleeping soundly through the entire ordeal.

It was quite impressive that this all occurred at the same time. On occasion I have had people reference my children unloading from the van as clowns getting out of a car - because let's be honest...it is a circus. But in this instance it really was like a bunch of chaotic clowns stuck in a car. The most upsetting part of the whole thing was that I had not a single napkin or baby wipe to help Flipper with. I just forgot to pack them. But it's amazing what will work in a pinch. FYI... picnic blankets works well to catch vomit.

Sooooooo happy to be home!

Easter Fun

On Good Friday we spent some time together in the kitchen. We dyed our Easter eggs and made these cute little mini-baskets. I got the recipe from bettycrocker.com. Basically you take cookie mix, prepare according to box directions and add in whatever sprinkles and such you want. Mold the dough around muffin tins and bake. Then while they are baking use food coloring and shredded coconut to make the "grass". We were supposed to use pipe cleaners for colorful handles but I did not have any so we used garbage bag ties. Then we added jelly beans for "eggs". My kids of course picked out sour gummy worms. So our Easter baskets had worms. Fitting. You can see Sweet MO eating a worm in the picture above. The treats were great fun and very yummy! To tie it in to the theme of Easter and remind the kids of Christ's Passion I asked them what each color of jelly bean could stand for. Red = Christ's blood shed for us; Green = new life after He rose from the dead; Yellow = the sun that rose on that 1st Easter morning when Mary Magdalen found the empty tomb; Black = the darkness of the world when Christ died on Good Friday. Orange = Christ's favorite color... ok so that is not exactly theologically accurate but since we couldn't think of anything for orange to represent the boys decided it Jesus's favorite color. Who knows - it could have been.

You did not say clothes...

I was typing away at my computer one day last week when my 3 year old TAZ came up behind me to ask if he could go outside. I said yes but put your shoes on. His older brothers were already outside so he grabbed his shoes and off he went. A minute later Flipper comes in "MOM - TAZ is outside naked AGAIN!" (this is not the first time). So I get up and go outside to find him standing on the deck completely naked - but wearing shoes. I looked at him and he very innocently said "You told me to get my shoes on". I guess I should have specified clothes as well but I did not know he was naked. I never looked at him when he asked - and for some silly reason I assumed he clothes on.

So moral of the story: always instruct children is a VERY detailed way and check to see if they are clothed before sending them outside.

The Reason Mothers Exist

I was going to post something about St Patrick today - and I still might - but I HAD to put this up first. I saw the single most absurd thing I have ever seen today. Hubblekid is not feeling well and so is taking a sick day and laying around in bed. This morning we watched a very interesting documentary on a nomadic community along the borders of Kazakhstan and Mongolia. It chronicled a family of eagle hunters. These people capture and train Golden Eagles for hunting purposes (like a coon dog). Well in order to capture and train the eagles they must take a baby one from a nest.

So the father of this family hikes off with his 5 sons to capture a baby bird from its nest. The problem here is that golden eagles make their nests on the side of cliffs. And since the 14 year old was the lightest he was charged with getting the baby out of the nest. This band of brothers (with father watching from below calling out instructions) tie a rope around this poor 14 year old's waist and lower him down over the side of the cliff. AND NO ONE SEES A PROBLEM WITH THIS!!! The boy dangles there by the nest, takes a baby bird (which they had already warned him may bite and try to attack him) stuffs it in a bag, THEN the brothers raise up the bird in the bag BEFORE their brother!! What if the mother bird returned?? The documentary had already covered how fierce these eagles can be. How do you think the mother bird would react if she flew home to discover a 14 year old human dangling by a rope in front of her nest stealing her baby??

Good Grief... this is exactly why God gave the male species a mother. No sane mother would ever have stood by and allowed this to go on. Keep in mind that this is a very primitive community. There was no repelling equipment or safety harnesses. Just a gang of teenagers dangling their little brother over a cliff with a rope tied around his waist. With dear old dad down below. Would love to know what Mama thought of this little adventure when the fellas returned... (thankfully with brother and baby bird safely in tow)

Step away from the cat

Far too often I find myself saying things that no one should actually have to say. Several of those instances are featured here on this blog. Today I found myself uttering another one of these pearls of wisdom. What is worse was that my friend was here to witness this insanity. We were seeing some friends off in the driveway when I turn around to find my sons collectively trying to put the cat through the basketball hoop. I actually had to say the words "Do not put the cat in the basketball hoop".

The only saving grace to this little incident was that they were - thankfully - using the little kid hoop low to the ground. They were not trying to shoot the poor animal in the air like a jump shot. But I am sure if given the time it would have escalated. Our poor cat - no wonder it is on prescription sedatives. (And that is not a joke - he literally is on sedatives - but who can blame him)

The What's Next Syndrome

I am going to issue a disclaimer that this subject is a source of irritation for me at the moment so it may be a little... ummm... straightforward. We live in a culture that is consumed with the next activity. We can barely enjoy what we are currently doing because the question of "what's next" inevitably creeps in. Be honest... how often do we sit in church and about half way through the homily our minds starts thinking "Hmmm... what sounds good for lunch?" In other words: What's Next? We go out for a nice walk as a family and at some point we think "ok - when I get home I need to fold some laundry" In other words: What's Next? I had JUST given birth to Baby Bosco, he had not even been weighed yet and someone says "Are you going to have any more?" In other words: What's Next? Can I not just enjoy holding this new one and revel in the fact that I am no longer pregnant?

I also feel like we are slaves to our calendars, PDAs, cell phones, etc. There is some kind of sick badge of Mommy Honor to be incredibly busy all the time. Going from one thing to the next to the next to the next. Heaven forbid our kids hear the word "no" cross our lips. Is it really a necessary part of human development to play soccer, flag football, karate AND take piano lessons all at the same time? It is very sad that we no longer live in a time when our kids can take off on their bikes and their only instruction be "be home before dark". So we feel a need to keep the kids entertained - and all the better if the activity is instructional or formative in the process. But when we allow so many activities to go on at the same time we instill in them the What's Next mentality. They get accustomed to going going going. And I will admit that I, as a parent, feel a lot or pressure to provide and transport to all of these activities. I don't want to feel like I am depriving my kids of opportunities but there are only so many days in a week and so many dollars in the bank account. And limiting your kids to just one activity per sports season can still make for a very busy life when you have 4 or 5 kids to shuttle around.

What sparked this whole tirade is how businesses have picked up on this What's Next problem we have. I went to Target in January to buy some winter hats and gloves because the forecast was predicting snow. There was not a hat or glove to be found but there was a whole section of bikinis. It was JANUARY. Correct me if I'm wrong - January is still winter in the northern hemisphere??? When do stores put out Christmas decorations? It used to be after Thanksgiving, then it moved to Halloween, now when is it? Labor Day?

Going back to the kids activities... we parents are being forced in to making decisions 4-6 months ahead of time. Summer camp's registrations are going on now - March. The camp itself does not take place until July. Spring sports registered in January. Again... January is not spring. I can disagree with the registration timing all day long but it does not change the fact that if I want my child to be able to participate I have to register (and pay for) something 2,3,4 months ahead of time. How am I supposed to know what will suit our family in July. This is insanity!

So while I am not actually as mad as this post perhaps sounds I do think it is absurd that we cannot just enjoy that which is in front of us. I am as much to blame as the next girl, I need to do a much better job of really being in the moment. I am NOT advocating being willy-nilly or unorganized. On the contrary. It is very important to know when you are supposed to do what. But in my opinion (which is worth nothing) we as a society are overscheduled and as a consequence we fall victim to this What's Next Syndrome for fear of missing something. I am going to try and take stock of areas of my life where I can practice being more fully present in the moment.